Headline, February26, 2014


!!! O"' TEENS !!! - HA HA HA "'

ALMOST EVERYONE -everyone thinks they know teens or what the problems of living with a teenager are:

You can't get into the bathroom or onto the telephone; weekends and holidays they sleep till mid-afternoon, rising only to demand a couple of hundred quids for a new pair of trainers and then:

Head off to hang out with their  sociopathic  mates in nightmarish shopping malls and nooks and corners and  amusement arcades.

And that's if you've got one of those well-behaved ones. But the real problem that teenagers set for their parents is this :  '''they tell them they are old and obsolete'''.

"'If it wasn't for children there'd be  no need to grow up at all in any society. Such is the wonder of postmodernity that these days you can be a  pony-tailed 45-year-old Beavis and  Butthead  fan and hardly anyone will raise an eyebrow"'.

Unless you've got kids. If you do, they'll never cease to tell you just what a sad old bum you are !!? 

The sorry truth is that the hipper you try to remain the more desperately embarrassing they'll find you. I think time to replace your Hip Joints!

Teenagers are deeply conservative folk who cling to the time-honoured philosophical tenet that they know the best about everything and that all  "adults are total fools".

"' Turn that wretched racket down! "', and so forth, sighs one author, about his teen son. And then continues, " Recently I even found myself telling him that they don't make rap records like they used to. I've already tried to interest him in the  old-school  sounds of Grandmaster Flash or Run DMC."' :

''All attempts generally greeted by  derisive snorts  of  "Run DMC?  They're cack!!"  delivered in the tone of a Rock Star. 

So mostly what I do to let the younger generation know that I've abandoned ship  is to listen to country records. This really is a sign that I've kissed youth culture goodbye.

I didn't mean indulging in a mild flirtation with country rock or outlaw country or new country.

Well of course, the reality is that in any previous generation they would simply be recognised as typical young soul rebels.

But the present, older generation, doesn't want to let go off the reigns. They're still kind of hoping to be forever young.

God knows....that many,  almost all  -oldies-  try to hang on to being hip. But by the time Snoopy Doggy Dog invades the house, they are all half nut, anyway.

!!! With the world run by middle-aged, alarmed, puzzled, insecure, confused men and women pretending to be grown up:

Teen can do without pretence. They needn't give a damn what people think of them.

The Teen share a  divine right to irresponsibility. So, The best strategy against the  teens  is to go with the flow !!!

"' I observed the teens very closely "', laments one parent, an author. "' And I was totally fascinated to see them stride up to their  "imaginary alternatives" and leading their armies into battles, pillaging across country after country, outwitting their enemies.

Winning usually,  and ever ready with their  'cheat mode'  if the circumstances just so demand"'. 
Why don't the older generations understand that :  Who wants to be young anyway!!? 

Why don't they get on the joys of being a misanthropic old git; drink and drink in reassuringly depressing pubs. Stay glum and get on with their boredoms. 

Listen to cricket on the radio incessantly! Acquire  new role models and trying making the best of a hilarious situation.

And while the elders are at it,  building a new life with the teens,  they can certainly console themselves that they are facing the final challenge for their post-Boomer generation: 

To turn into the kind of person the teens can really look down on:

I for one have a very special, special heart and love for teens. Nothing is more enjoyable than to learn from them.

I just so recently  overheard a group of them,  -pointing out all the neat strategies you could use to grab South America, then wheel their armies into Africa and the Middle East:

And the clever ways they would use to building up their forces to be invincible, and the stunning manoeuvre they would execute to bring the expeditionary force down from Kamchatka to grab:

What I assume to be Australasia, and thereby wipe out a really pesky opponent:

In hindsight, and with relief,  Thank Goodness,  for that , I think they were discussing a recent computer game.

With respectful and loving dedication to the Billions of Teens, the World over! 
The world would be horribly dull without you all:

All of sudden he's fourteen,  and playing  Cypress Hill.  and the oldies are going:

"!? Do You Call That Music?!" : Hahaha!

See Ya all on !WOW! -the World Students Society Computers-Internet-Wireless:

''' The Teen Spirit "'

Good Night & God Bless!

SAM Daily Times - the Voice of the Voiceless


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